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Snakeboarders

"IF YOU COME NEAR US I'LL BARK AT YOU SO HARD YOU WON'T KNOW WHAT HIT YOU!" I was so scary that all the people on the I'mbarkadero shrunk closer to the buildings to give me enough room to beat the monster up if I needed to.

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Hashtag Throwback Thursday

That's why I was still tied to Mom when we came around Creature Corner, where I have met a lion, a wolf-dog, and too many bunny rabbits to count. This morning there was a new creature flumping across the path. It was a horseshoe-crab-shaped ball of fur that moved like a land sting ray. "STRIPEY STINK-CAT!" I barked.

In the woods

I don't use toilets, but I guessed that sitting on a nice warm toilet seat that someone had left for you would be nice, like a hug. "It's a perfect day, isn't it?!" I said. "Did you notice all the enchantment lying around?

The Pounding Fathers

It must be tough running with the weight of hundreds of miles on their backs when they didn't even know what the next mile held yet. But then I remembered how Mom finds her way around places we'd never been before. Maybe humans can see the future better than dogs can, and that's why they like planning so much.

Storytelling

The trail that Mom and I ran on our last day in the desert was like a story told by a people puppy that had just broken into the Halloween candy stash. It was a collection of details that didn't have anything to do with each other, and didn't make a whole lot of sense when you put them together.

Pie Piper

She was running faster that I knew she would normally, but if she slowed down then we would be overrun by people puppies making observations about how fat Mom’s thighs were, or asking her why she didn’t have a husband. Then we reached a steep slope and sped up it as fast as we could.

Slumberjack

Concentrating is like an adventure where nothing happens, and the more you do of it the more you want to tell someone about it and the less there is to tell. I guess that’s the difference between an adventure and what Mom calls a "pain in the ass.”

Scattering cows and chasing goats

"YOU don't even fetch frisbees." "Right! That's the point. Whenever you throw a frisbee, I chase it and then wait for you to catch up so that you'll pick it up and throw it again. That makes running together fun."

More hotdogs in 2020

"It’s not a race.” “Are you sure it’s not a race? They’re giving out medals and stuff…” “No, it’s a challenge. There’s a difference. A race is something that you do against someone else, a challenge is when you commit to doing something difficult and compete with yourself. It’s like a competitive resolution. Challenges are different for everybody because they depend on context.” “Wait, so a challenge is a contest?”

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