The kaleidoscope of trees and moss fell into a pattern that made sense. “I’ve been here before!” I wagged.

“I thought you said we couldn’t get lost!” I gasped. Suddenly, the mailman van felt very far away.

“When I was younger, I used to look at maps of logging roads and imagine what it would be like to explore all those paths to nowhere.”

He aimed his witch at the empty air between the potty and the next mountain. “Aren’t your pictures missing someone?”

I looked back at the bite mark and my body went cold. A something was flapping just beyond the edge of it...

“You don’t know where they’ve been,” he said judgily, like Mom was irresponsible for not caring enough to check what her avocados were up to

“No, Mom!” I said with a subtle pull on the leash. “It’s a trap! He’s trying to dognap you!”

She didn't even bother to unlock the mailman van before she descended on me with a hunerd pinching fingers.

"You're not even paying attention to who might be sneaking up on you!” I checked out all the windows, then I checked them again.

“The part where you don’t know how it’s going to end is the funnest part of any story,” I agreed. 

The real reason we were in the Outback of Nevada was because we wanted to say Winnemucca. Try it: Winnemucca, Winnemucca, Winnemucca

"Oh brother," she said from behind me in a voice like an eye roll. My collar dug into my throat as she reeled me in a little closer.

"Mom! No! How could you? I'm a celebrity. It'll be all over TMZ! And my fans will never recognize me with that on."

The crowd went silent as everyone held their breath. The only noise on the farm was the chicka-chicka-chick of maracas. The squiggle snarled

Questions like that are how Mom cheats at arguments. She knows that dogs can't tell the future like she can.

Pots clattered as she dug through the kitchen, searching for I-knew-not-what. She grunted triumphantly and pulled out the knife.

Screams filled the inside of the mailman van as the ghosts of all the dogless families he'd eaten rattled the bars.

"Oh my dog! It's the shoopacabra!" I barked. "Let's get him!" I leaned hard into the leash and ordered him to run.

I couldn't tell if it was nature or civilization calling her back, just that Mom was accepting the call.

If you try to make everything look like the plan, then you're going to miss a lot and spend the whole adventure being frustrated.