An interview with The People
The People: Oscar, you should write a book! (I did! Buy it here!)
Oscar: But I already wrote all of these stories and you get to read them right away for free.
The People: But we like to pay money for things! Where can we pay money to read your stories again? (Here! Buy it here!)
Oscar: Well, of course I want to give The People what they want. Okay, here’s what I’ll do: I’ll take all of my best stories from all of our favorite adventures, and I’ll make them better. I’ll tell you about a few things that I left out the first time, and then I’ll write a few more new things. How about that?
The People: Where can I buy your book?
Oscar: The paperbook be on Amazon, and the computer-book will be in the Kindle store.
The People: Yay! But will you have pictures too? (Yes! Take a look here!)
Oscar: But I trained Mom to use Instagram so that even people who can’t read can see pictures of me for free. Do you need more?
The People, especially the ladies: But we can’t get enough of looking at your butt!
Oscar: Well that’s understandable. Okay, I’ll add pictures, but I’ll have Mom put them through an app that makes them look like I drew them by paw. That way when you buy the book you will only have to use a little bit of money.
The People: You can draw too? You’re the most talented dog in the world.
Oscar: I know.
The People: Can I get a paw-tographed copy?
Oscar: Yes! Although the order process will be a little bit different and it’ll cost a little more ($22.00, includes shipping and pawing) for me to bribe the mail man to bring it to your house without murdering you, and it’ll take a little longer for me to send it to you. If you want a paw-tographed copy, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I’ll tell you more.