With our legs and a little help from The Witch, we had everything we needed to get to the dooms. Once mom realized that when the answers are inside of you, you don't have to follow anyone else's rules, the freedom fell into her legs and she started jogging. It didn’t matter if she got sweaty, because she had been wearing the same clothes for four days anyway, and already smelled like the stray humans in The City who camp in the dog bathroom.
Mom and I had unfinished business. Last year Mom and I took our expedition North too early and were turned around by white dirt in too many places. There were a couple of spots that we vowed to return to later in the season when the mountains had sweat off their white dirt cloaks. Our... Continue Reading →
Others looked like they had lost a bet with Home Depot and had to wear all of the mismatched parts that no one wanted. On this side of the channel, away from Legoland, the landscape didn't follow any instruction book. The flowers bloomed in sloppy disorder, there was no sidewalk to walk on, and puddles took over the bare earth. "Mom, I can't tell if this is pretty, or not pretty," I said.
Next we met a very handsome gentleman dressed in a tux just like me. Only Oscar and James Bond can wear a tux on a hot day without panting, and this guy was struggling. But as I came past, he rose up from being a potato to say hello and sniff my butt. "It’s a miracle!” said his lady. “He was too hot to walk down the hill, but now that he’s smelled your irresistible butt, he has legs to stand on again!”
Mom says that I have trouble making friends because I'm an "asshole." That's silly, because I always make lots of friends at the dog park and have a wonderful time barking in their face until they curl up into a submissive ball, or get mad and nip at me (then I bark some more). I... Continue Reading →
What a busy day! I didn't expect Mom to wake me up early because she was out late on an adventure with my cat-sister. My cat-sister had lost a fight and came home with her eye swollen shut. When she walked in all bloody and tough-looking, I got up in her grill yelling, "VIOLENCE IS... Continue Reading →
Oscar the marine mammal here. My doggie Siri (a.k.a. Mom) tells me that this 2-month stretch of bad weather is going to break soon, but not yet. So it was back out into the wet this morning. I have gotten used to the rain and cold, and have developed ways to cope. For example, because... Continue Reading →
This was supposed to be posted last week, but I don't think my Chief of Staff is very committed to her job right now, because she hasn't finished it until now. I had to take Mom on her long run so that she would be ready for her marathong, so we went to The Wetlands... Continue Reading →
See the video I made about this run here. It's adventure day! I had to help mom drive a real long time to get to today's adventure. When we drove through the 4,927 stoplights in The City, I kissed her gently on the eyeball or in the ear hole at each one so that she... Continue Reading →